New York is the best city in the country. Commerce, activities, and tons of hot, smart people.
…but NYC (specifically Manhattan) has the WORST STRIP CLUBS EVER. I blame Giuliani. Topless only and infested with entitled bitches who get so much green from bored hedgefund guys, they think you need to pay their rent to get a titty in your face.
(It’s nearly Halloween, so every stripper had a terrible costume on. I think this was supposed to be a Russian nurse whore.)
VIP was particularly bad. On a Saturday night, they boast 32-40 strippers (I asked management) and about 20 patrons at any given time. There’s nothing more off-putting than walking into a club and feeling the palpable, “how am I gonna buy my illegitimate child diapers with these shitty tips?” discontentment of the girls on the floor.
But the best/worst thing about VIP? The bartender. This bitch was so fucked up. I ordered my friend a vodka and grapefruit, and she poured it in separate glasses. Immediately after serving us our drinks, she dove into the olives in the garnish tray on the bar.
…I wasn’t kidding. Bitch was scooping olives out of the tray and into her mouth with her bare hands while we laughed hysterically inches from her. This wasn’t an alcohol-related wastedness…pills or heroin, I’m guessing.
The only reason I’m not giving this shithole an “F” is because the management was extremely nice and gave us free passes when we left.